Our man in the South West Alan Payling light-heartedly adjudicates on the thorny question of how to eat a cream tea properly in God’s own county – and offers advice on where coach parties might partake
I am obliged to my learned friend Jonathan Welch for inviting me to share my ‘expert’ opinion on the question of how to eat a cream tea. Readers will recall that in issue 1541, while enjoying what sounded like the mouth watering delights of the afternoon tea that is now being served by Superbus on its luxury sight seeing tour in Edinburgh, Jonathan invited me to decide whether jam or cream should go on the scone first. This, as readers may know, has been the cause of many angry incursions by the Cornish into England if anyone dares to eat a cream tea Devon style in Kernow. So, for all those who take their passengers into Devon and Cornwall, in order to avoid an international incident, please read on and take very careful note.
But first, Jonathan tells us that while he was clearly served the wherewithal to make a cream tea, what he did was, and I quote: ‘I opted for butter then jam, and no clotted cream.’ Jonathan, please, that’s not a cream tea, that’s bread and jam! Don’t think of that as a criticism though. Far from it. As a fellow northerner, bread and jam was regarded as a delicacy when I were a lad. However, please accept my feedback as an important and cautionary observation to clarify matters because if anyone followed your example while in Devon and Cornwall, they would immediately be extradited back to where they came from – and without compensation.
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